Do you send out generic group invites inviting friends over for a BBQ?
Do you have a robotic voice when calling a co-worker asking them for an update along with a generic question template?
When you meet someone for the first time do you greet them with the same facial expression as anyone else?
Never done any of this?
So why do it in a text or email? Why engage with someone in differently then you would in person?
Oh wait, I know – because it’s synchronous, it’s a conversation, it requires a back and forth.
And that’s what our interactions have been boiled down to – have a conversation with someone where their answers shape the remainder of the message, or lob a message over the fence hoping it sticks – maybe we want the feedback, maybe we don’t, who cares it’s off our plate and not ours to deal with anymore.
In addition, when I lob it over the fence, I’ve put all my ideas out there and spent an hour (at least) crafting that perfect message – no witty banter, no back and forth to be had – no uncomfortable moments of “how do I respond”, “I didn’t expect that line of questioning”, etc.
And that’s the uncomfortable – talking, communicating, getting feedback, building ideas – sending emails is easy, take it to a conversation and now you’re talking.
